Rapping the Night Away and stuff

The need for positive male influences in my life came firstly in the form of my grandad, "Gramps" as he is known to me – who arranged amongst other things taught me to swim in the Brighton sea, play cards, appreciate a good stroll and what a good whiskey tastes like (not when was nine though . . . I was nine and a half!). When I was little I used to think he was a giant and now at 92 years he remains that to me in every sense of the word.

Then there was my brother-in-law, my oldest sister’s husband, Shaun . . . I learned my trade from this man that has held me in stead all my life. This is the man I have explored the inside of pubs with, started off chants at football with, had some classic heart-to-hearts with and finished off some pukka curries late on a Friday night with. Above all Shaun was one of my best mates and will always remain so.

In a nutshell, from all of them, my mum, nan, Gramps, sisters and brother-in-law I have had the most amazing amount of love. Thank you!!

I suppose everything started getting interesting when I was about 13 and girls were on the scene. It was about this time that Vanilla Ice brought out his massive hit “Ice! Ice! Baby”. I’d always been into hip-hop and rap music. I mean, when I was 10, the first concert my sister took me to was a triple at the Brighton Centre of The Beastie Boys, LL Cool J and Public Enemy. But I went mental for that Vanilla Ice tune, so much so that I had all the zigzag lines cut in my hair and had black/blonde streaks at the front: I mean, I really went to town. And it was this time that had a massive input and impact on my life. It was 1990 that the song came out and that year my sister and brother-in-law took my niece and me away to the Isle of Wight where we stayed in a holiday camp. And as at all holidays camps they had dance competitions, games and, before X-Factor or BGT was a twinkle in Simon’s eye, they had singing/talent competitions. .

And that was where Vanilla Ice comes in.

During the auditions I started chatting to a younger boy called Nyrone and it became very clear, very quickly that both of us loved the same music. And it was then that the idea hit me . . . so from going from not knowing what to do to knowing exactly what to do.

Like I said it was at this time that I became really into girls. And looking into that crowd it was polluted with crumpet. They were all looking up at the next wannabe boy band or solo artiste and it was then that I thought we’ve got a chance here!” After 4 boys who were more like Dogslife than Westlife had finished it was our turn. All the others had their backing tracks to sing to and as Nyrone and me took to the stage they asked for our tape (tape? Get with it grandad!) to which I replied “We only need 2 mics” and were met with a very puzzled look from the compere.

After 10 seconds silence I shouted the immortal words “Yo, v.i.p. lets kick it” and that’s the moment Nyrone started his beatboxing (making the beats with his mouth) and I rapped the whole sound over it. The girls – and the whole crowd - had never seen anything like it before, and they properly loved it. For the rest of the week we were like superstars. Safe to say we won the competition and went on to the National Finals in Scarborough (very Vagas) and came second to a Rick Astley tribute with a waistcoat and frilly shirt!!! But we had a whale of a time and a little taster of what a certain Mr Cardle is feeling right now.

Oh! before I forget, Nyrone’s surname is Nosworthy, he’s now playing right back in the Premiership for Sunderland. Well done. I’m proud of you mate . . . I wonder if he ever regrets the split of the duo. Playing football, the money, the girls, the fame! NOT A CHANCE!

The next two years were pretty run of the mill you know: girlfriends, house parties, first taste of alcohol . . . I mean, getting so drunk that you wake up in a field in just pants, socks and shoes with a half ton cow standing over you licking it’s lips . . . you know, all the normal stuff!!

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See you soon
Jamie